Bad Manners and Brimstone

Whenever I'm hosting-with-nibbles, I try to make at least one batch of my crunchy cheese shortbread biscuits (that's 'biscuits' in the Rightpondian sense, of course). They're dead easy, quite unusual, and everybody loves them. Also they keep, so you can make them well ahead of time. (They also are pretty robust provided you pack them well, so they're great for taking on picnics or bringing to the office to share. When my DH's workplace was nearly in meltdown earlier this summer due to being messed with by the Powers That Be, I baked almost every week so I could send him off to work bearing comfort for all.)

Crunchy cheese shortbreads

6 oz plain (all-purpose) flour
3 oz semolina*
6 oz butter
4 oz tangy hard cheese, e.g. a mature English Cheddar, grated finely**
1 tsp salt
Optional: A bit of ground paprika***

Pre-heat oven to 150C/gas Mark 2/300F.

Sift the flour into a mixing bowl; mix in the semolina and salt. Add the cheese and rub it in evenly; then add the butter and rub in until it forms a rather greasy lump of dough. (It's also OK to add the butter first and then the cheese. Just don't try to save time by adding butter and cheese together - each clumps together, and it's almost impossible to get an even mix.)

Roll it out on a floured worktop or board, and cut into shapes. The dough holds a shape well so you can use any kind of ornamental cutter.

Place them on a greased baking sheet (you can afford to place them close to each other - they hardly spread at all in the oven) and bake for anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour. The time they need will depend on your oven and how thick you have rolled them; just keep checking after 30 minutes or so. When they have just begun to change colour, they're done.

When quite cool, sprinkle just a bit of paprika on top (them (don't do this before baking: the taste of burnt paprika ruins any food!) and put them into an airtight container. If you can only keep from wolfing them all on the spot they will stay fresh and crisp for weeks.

Notes:

*I don't know how commonplace semolina is in the US. If it's not something sold in mainstream stores, Middle Eastern stores are a good bet because it figures in many Turkish honey cakes and desserts. You need it to give the shortbread a crunchy texture. (I have tried fine couscous, but that's just slightly too big a grain for comfort.)

**I don't know what American cheese might equate to real mature Cheddar. Whatever you use must be properly hard (no 'give' if you try to pinch it) with lots of flavour. Real Italian Parmesan or grana padano is fine. I don't use it myself, because over here it's much more expensive than a good cheddar and the result is no nicer; but I'd pay the extra like a shot rather than make my shortbreads with a 'meh'-flavoured cheese.


***The paprika is actually not so much for flavour, though it is nice, but to make them look savoury. These look just like ordinary shortbreads, and we all know how disconcerting it is to take a mouthful of something you expect to be sweet and find it savoury (or vice versa)! Alternatively, you might press a tiny sprig of fresh rosemary into the top of each one before baking. Or anything else you can think of that would have the same visual effect.

I wonder if it was a proper hungarian, hot paprika.
My Hungarian uncle complained that so many "American paprikas" were trash. (I grew up and learned how right he was.)

Edit punctuation

Tortilla roll-ups. A bit time consuming to prepare, but for 10 people? A little bit goes a long way.

Spread cream cheese on the (low carb;)) flour tortillas, lay down some thinly sliced corned beef to cover the tortillas. Roll the tortillas to make a log then cut them into 3/4-inch pieces.

You can substitute the corned beef with anything of your choice like salami or veggies. For 10 people I think 3-4 8-inch tortillas would be enough (I usually make this to feed a crowd )

Aleko, those sound fantastic!  I will try them.

I am not surprised that couscous didn’t work. It is a tiny pasta, not a grain.  Semolina is easy to find here in Tel Aviv and as I recall it was pretty easy to find in Columbus, too. Italian groceries or supermarket sections might be a good place to start.

Have you ever tried them with part cornmeal? That might give an interesting flavor, too. I’d use fine, not polenta/grits (they are the same thing, coarse corn meal - just usually costs a lot more if the label says polenta!)

Hmmm, just to show how ignorant I am about wine, what is it about your recipe that ruins the wine? It sounds so good.

Hmmm, just to show how ignorant I am about wine, what is it about your recipe that ruins the wine? It sounds so good.

It's because artichokes contain a chemical called cynarin which makes most wines taste weird.