Author Topic: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom  (Read 2244 times)

QueenFaninCA

Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #15 on: February 10, 2020, 02:08:57 pm »
My suspicion is that the "victim" is known in that circle for rifling though bathroom cabinets and finally got their comeuppance.
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Titanica

Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #16 on: February 10, 2020, 02:29:50 pm »
I have a book by Miss Manners, published over 20 years ago, where this exact situation occurred. Although at that time, it was one of the other guests that wrote in. For that letter, Miss Manners said that the hostess could "get away" with the prank if they feigned ignorance: "Oh, dear! I hope she's all right! I wonder what happened."

I think it is the unveiling of the fact that it was a definite booby trap and that others were made aware of it (whether before or after the fact, it doesn't matter) that puts a bad taste in my mouth.

I was coming to post something similar - I recall reading about this in Dear Abby at least 40 years ago.

JeanFromBNA

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #17 on: February 10, 2020, 03:09:10 pm »
I also remember reading about this in a Miss Manners book from many years ago. It's a dumb thing to do, unless you have a history of mutual practical jokes.

Our guest bathroom medicine cabinet has Tylenol, antacids, Benadryl, tampons, and a few other things that a guest might need but not have. We don't keep anything private in it.  All the prescriptions, etc. are up in our bathroom off of our bedroom.  One time, a guest who was staying over with two other guests asked if he could use our bathroom.  I told him it was fine.  I was surprised when he took a shower.  "Use the bathroom" usually means the toilet and sink. I was embarrassed because we hadn't specially cleaned our shower, or set out towels, and he went hunting around for a towel and washcloth.

Soop

Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #18 on: February 11, 2020, 07:22:39 am »
I just can't imagine being so concerned about someone seeing what's in your bathroom cabinet that you would feel the need to booby-trap it. But then I don't keep much in mine. It's not a good place to store medications (too damp and warm), so really there's just extra toothbrushes and some bandaids. All the "secret" stuff is in the bedroom.
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Hmmm

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #19 on: February 11, 2020, 09:15:41 am »
My suspicion is that the "victim" is known in that circle for rifling though bathroom cabinets and finally got their comeuppance.

This was my thought, too. A host would have to have a good suspicion that someone would go into the medicine cabinet for the "joke" to even work.

 
I also remember reading about this in a Miss Manners book from many years ago. It's a dumb thing to do, unless you have a history of mutual practical jokes.

Our guest bathroom medicine cabinet has Tylenol, antacids, Benadryl, tampons, and a few other things that a guest might need but not have. We don't keep anything private in it.  All the prescriptions, etc. are up in our bathroom off of our bedroom.  One time, a guest who was staying over with two other guests asked if he could use our bathroom.  I told him it was fine.  I was surprised when he took a shower.  "Use the bathroom" usually means the toilet and sink. I was embarrassed because we hadn't specially cleaned our shower, or set out towels, and he went hunting around for a towel and washcloth.
I'm curious about this. Do you mean they were spending the night at your house but you weren't expecting them to take a shower before bed or in the morning?

lowspark

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #20 on: February 11, 2020, 11:11:03 am »
This is sort of a tangent, but I've never really understood keeping medicines in the bathroom. I keep mine in the kitchen. That's where I'm gong to take them, especially if I need to swallow something with a glass of water. I keep band-aids and neosporin in the kitchen, too. That's where I most often need them!
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JeanFromBNA

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #21 on: February 11, 2020, 02:06:15 pm »
I also remember reading about this in a Miss Manners book from many years ago. It's a dumb thing to do, unless you have a history of mutual practical jokes.

Our guest bathroom medicine cabinet has Tylenol, antacids, Benadryl, tampons, and a few other things that a guest might need but not have. We don't keep anything private in it.  All the prescriptions, etc. are up in our bathroom off of our bedroom.  One time, a guest who was staying over with two other guests asked if he could use our bathroom.  I told him it was fine.  I was surprised when he took a shower.  "Use the bathroom" usually means the toilet and sink. I was embarrassed because we hadn't specially cleaned our shower, or set out towels, and he went hunting around for a towel and washcloth.
I'm curious about this. Do you mean they were spending the night at your house but you weren't expecting them to take a shower before bed or in the morning?
We expected them to take a shower in the full guest bathroom where we had towels, washcloths, etc. ready for them.  Because of the low water pressure, you can't take two showers at the same time, so they wouldn't have been able to use our shower and the guest shower, unless they wanted to stand under a slow drip.

TootsNYC

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #22 on: February 11, 2020, 05:58:19 pm »
If someone were staying overnight with me, and it was morning-shower time, I'd assume that "use your bathroom" meant the whole thing.

And if I were a visitor, I'd never think that both showers couldn't go at once (and there's benefit in being able to shower while someone else is toiletry-ing or toileting).

I think that aspect--an overnight visitor--threw the communication off.
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Venus193

Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #23 on: February 11, 2020, 10:33:12 pm »
In absence of more information I think the host was way out of line and so were the guests who were in the know and who bullied the victim for the rest of the evening.

If that had been me I would have left and not looked back at these people. This is middle-school nonsense.
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Hmmm

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #24 on: February 12, 2020, 07:49:18 am »
I also remember reading about this in a Miss Manners book from many years ago. It's a dumb thing to do, unless you have a history of mutual practical jokes.

Our guest bathroom medicine cabinet has Tylenol, antacids, Benadryl, tampons, and a few other things that a guest might need but not have. We don't keep anything private in it.  All the prescriptions, etc. are up in our bathroom off of our bedroom.  One time, a guest who was staying over with two other guests asked if he could use our bathroom.  I told him it was fine.  I was surprised when he took a shower.  "Use the bathroom" usually means the toilet and sink. I was embarrassed because we hadn't specially cleaned our shower, or set out towels, and he went hunting around for a towel and washcloth.
I'm curious about this. Do you mean they were spending the night at your house but you weren't expecting them to take a shower before bed or in the morning?
We expected them to take a shower in the full guest bathroom where we had towels, washcloths, etc. ready for them.  Because of the low water pressure, you can't take two showers at the same time, so they wouldn't have been able to use our shower and the guest shower, unless they wanted to stand under a slow drip.

Ah, thanks, didn't get that by "our bathroom" you mean your master bath and not the guest bath.

LadyJaneinMD

Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #25 on: February 12, 2020, 01:15:32 pm »
This is sort of a tangent, but I've never really understood keeping medicines in the bathroom. I keep mine in the kitchen. That's where I'm gong to take them, especially if I need to swallow something with a glass of water. I keep band-aids and neosporin in the kitchen, too. That's where I most often need them!

I keep mine in a suitcase.  Once a month I pull out the suitcase and fill up 4-5 weeks' worth of daily meds, then pack it all away again.  I have a LOT of meds, and usually 3 or more months of each. 

gellchom

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #26 on: February 12, 2020, 01:45:35 pm »
I also remember reading about this in a Miss Manners book from many years ago. It's a dumb thing to do, unless you have a history of mutual practical jokes.

Our guest bathroom medicine cabinet has Tylenol, antacids, Benadryl, tampons, and a few other things that a guest might need but not have. We don't keep anything private in it.  All the prescriptions, etc. are up in our bathroom off of our bedroom.  One time, a guest who was staying over with two other guests asked if he could use our bathroom.  I told him it was fine.  I was surprised when he took a shower.  "Use the bathroom" usually means the toilet and sink. I was embarrassed because we hadn't specially cleaned our shower, or set out towels, and he went hunting around for a towel and washcloth.
I'm curious about this. Do you mean they were spending the night at your house but you weren't expecting them to take a shower before bed or in the morning?
We expected them to take a shower in the full guest bathroom where we had towels, washcloths, etc. ready for them.  Because of the low water pressure, you can't take two showers at the same time, so they wouldn't have been able to use our shower and the guest shower, unless they wanted to stand under a slow drip.

Ah, thanks, didn't get that by "our bathroom" you mean your master bath and not the guest bath.

Even so, I don't think it was so strange -- maybe if he had just gone ahead and used the master bath without asking, or if he was the only guest and just preferred your shower for some reason.

It sounds like you had at least three house guests and one full guest bathroom for them.  So if everyone needed to shower at about the same time, it doesn't seem so strange to me for a guest, if it's someone who knows you pretty well, to ask if it's okay for him to use yours. 

And I wouldn't expect him to know that it doesn't work well in your house for both showers to be going at the same time.

I agree that this was just a failure of communication; you didn't know he meant to shower, and he didn't realize that you didn't.  I'm curious to know what you would have said if he had clarified that he meant to shower.  Would you have told him no, or gone in and put out towels and put away items, or what?

JeanFromBNA

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #27 on: February 17, 2020, 06:12:41 pm »
I also remember reading about this in a Miss Manners book from many years ago. It's a dumb thing to do, unless you have a history of mutual practical jokes.

Our guest bathroom medicine cabinet has Tylenol, antacids, Benadryl, tampons, and a few other things that a guest might need but not have. We don't keep anything private in it.  All the prescriptions, etc. are up in our bathroom off of our bedroom.  One time, a guest who was staying over with two other guests asked if he could use our bathroom.  I told him it was fine.  I was surprised when he took a shower.  "Use the bathroom" usually means the toilet and sink. I was embarrassed because we hadn't specially cleaned our shower, or set out towels, and he went hunting around for a towel and washcloth.
I'm curious about this. Do you mean they were spending the night at your house but you weren't expecting them to take a shower before bed or in the morning?
We expected them to take a shower in the full guest bathroom where we had towels, washcloths, etc. ready for them.  Because of the low water pressure, you can't take two showers at the same time, so they wouldn't have been able to use our shower and the guest shower, unless they wanted to stand under a slow drip.

Ah, thanks, didn't get that by "our bathroom" you mean your master bath and not the guest bath.

Even so, I don't think it was so strange -- maybe if he had just gone ahead and used the master bath without asking, or if he was the only guest and just preferred your shower for some reason.

It sounds like you had at least three house guests and one full guest bathroom for them.  So if everyone needed to shower at about the same time, it doesn't seem so strange to me for a guest, if it's someone who knows you pretty well, to ask if it's okay for him to use yours. 

And I wouldn't expect him to know that it doesn't work well in your house for both showers to be going at the same time.

I agree that this was just a failure of communication; you didn't know he meant to shower, and he didn't realize that you didn't.  I'm curious to know what you would have said if he had clarified that he meant to shower.  Would you have told him no, or gone in and put out towels and put away items, or what?
He didn't know us very well.  He was a friend of a friend who had come to town for a seminar.  He was otherwise polite. If he had asked to use our shower, I would have asked him to wait for the the guest room shower, because we can only do one major thing with water at a time. My husband usually tells guests that. I'm embarrassed by the state of the shower in the master bath; we've had problems with the grout and mildew, and it's not fit for company.  If he just wanted to use the toilet in the master bath while someone else was showering, that would have been fine (flushing results in low water pressure in the shower, but it eventually recovers). I wouldn't expect him to rummage around in cupboards and closets to find items he needs unless it was an emergency.  We leave plenty of supplies in plain sight for our for our guest in a full guest bathroom and adjoining bedroom. If they ask me for a different towel, or something, I'd get it for them.  Maybe I'm weird, but I think that master bathroom storage is private.
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gramma dishes

Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #28 on: February 17, 2020, 06:59:03 pm »

He didn't know us very well.  He was a friend of a friend who had come to town for a seminar.  He was otherwise polite. If he had asked to use our shower, I would have asked him to wait for the the guest room shower, because we can only do one major thing with water at a time. My husband usually tells guests that. I'm embarrassed by the state of the shower in the master bath; we've had problems with the grout and mildew, and it's not fit for company.  If he just wanted to use the toilet in the master bath while someone else was showering, that would have been fine (flushing results in low water pressure in the shower, but it eventually recovers). I wouldn't expect him to rummage around in cupboards and closets to find items he needs unless it was an emergency.  We leave plenty of supplies in plain sight for our for our guest in a full guest bathroom and adjoining bedroom. If they ask me for a different towel, or something, I'd get it for them.  Maybe I'm weird, but I think that master bathroom storage is private.

I agree with you.  First of all I would be uncomfortable hosting someone I didn't know well overnight to begin with.  And if they asked to use my master bath, I would have assumed that they really, really needed to pee and someone else was already using 'his' designated bathroom and therefore needed to use mine.
It would bother me a lot to have someone using my private facilities to shower when I had specifically super cleaned the guest bathroom and outfitted it with appropriate towels and other amenities.  I would have felt very uncomfortable indeed, just like you!
« Last Edit: February 18, 2020, 07:39:46 am by gramma dishes »
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Aleko

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Re: Party host’s booby-trapped bathroom
« Reply #29 on: February 18, 2020, 01:14:28 am »
Sounds to me like a man whose brain doesn't function in the morning till he's had coffee. Didn't realise that he hadn't made clear that he wanted your bathroom for a shower, simply didn't think about towels till he had showered, then had no choice but to rummage around till he found one.