Plus 1 allows you to bring whomever you like to the wedding, up and until you RSVP with your plus 1's name. If you have already given the happy couple your Plus 1's information, if they now can't make the event, you don't get to just slide someone in there without the happy couple's OK.
If one of the two specifically invited people in a couple can't make it, the remaining person also isn't free to just add someone without OKing it with the happy couple.
If it was either of these two scenarios, I think the MIL was OK but should have let the invited sister know that it was fine to bring the LW's wife as her guest, in place of her plus 1 that can't attend.
If she was invited with a plus 1 and had not yet sent her RSVP, even if they expected her to bring her long term boyfriend, they can't object if she chooses to bring someone else.
Regardless of the circumstances, the LW is more than a bit full of himself.
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