Author Topic: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?  (Read 2277 times)

Hmmm

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #45 on: October 16, 2019, 08:52:39 am »
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In the US, the term "dress shirt" is a category and not a specific item of clothing

So it is in the UK: but here it's a quite different category. It covers any shirt designed specifically for evening dress, either "black tie" (black bow tie and dinner jacket) in which case it may have ruffles down the front as Chez Miriam says, or "white tie" (white bow tie, starched white waistcoat and tailcoat), in which case it is fastened down the front with removable studs - necessary because the shirt has to be boil-washed and the front starched rigid, a process which buttons would not survive - and has a separate starched collar fixed to it with more studs.

I think we normally refer to that as a tuxedo shirt. Could be other names, but that is the only one I'm aware of.
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PVZFan

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #46 on: October 16, 2019, 11:01:26 am »
When I read jpcher's post, I imagined the groom intending to change into one of those shirts that has a couple of rows of (vertical) ruffles down the front - I thought they were a dress shirt.

Oops! ;) ;D

LOL!

I'm (we weren't) that fancy . . . by dress shirt I meant something that would be worn at the office and acceptable wear for a suit at weddings, funerals, fancy parties, etc.

Sometimes his shirts had buttoned-down collars (does that make it dressier than other shirts?) sometimes not.

I'm talking about shirts that buttoned down the front whether it's made of silk or cotton. Not polos or t-shirts.

However, flannel? No not a dress shirt. LOL!

I can't be the only person who really wants a pic, can I?
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TootsNYC

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #47 on: October 16, 2019, 01:57:41 pm »
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Sometimes his shirts had buttoned-down collars (does that make it dressier than other shirts?) sometimes not.

Less dressy
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surlyrat

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #48 on: October 17, 2019, 09:39:07 pm »
Someone posted in the original Ehell forum back in Delphi that it was okay to wear black to an evening wedding in NYC, but not to a daytime wedding in Atlanta.

I know there are a lot of gray areas in between- those are the two extremes.

But I am very glad nobody wore black to my morning wedding in the South.

Why would it have made a difference?

Hmmm

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #49 on: October 18, 2019, 08:36:20 am »
Someone posted in the original Ehell forum back in Delphi that it was okay to wear black to an evening wedding in NYC, but not to a daytime wedding in Atlanta.

I know there are a lot of gray areas in between- those are the two extremes.

But I am very glad nobody wore black to my morning wedding in the South.

Why would it have made a difference?

I don't know when Whiterose married, but I do remember times when there were very specific "rule" on wearing black, not just in the south. I read an article in the NY Times a year ago that talked about the adoption of all black in the city in the late 70's early 80s and it was the avant-garde who really popularized it and at first some even in NYC were horrified by it. 

Adoption wasn't wide spread until probably the late 80's early 90's. I graduated college in the late 1980s and my first job was in Southern California. One of the first really nice outfits I bought was a black light weight knit pencil skirt with matching black top. The outfit looked great on but it took me forever to convince myself in the dressing room that even though I was only 21, I could pull off an all black work outfit without looking like I was going to a funeral. In S. Cal, I only ever got compliments. When I moved back to Texas a year later and would wear the outfit to work, I'd often get someone asking me if I was attending a funeral that day. My mom admitted the outfit looked good but really disliked seeing me since she still held to the idea that young 20 year olds did not dress in all black during the day, especially in the Spring. 

So yeah, can see where black at a morning wedding in the South would have been pretty out of place.
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Rose Red

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #50 on: October 18, 2019, 09:28:15 am »
I have worn black to evening wedding receptions but even now in 2019, I'd feel uncomfortable wearing black to morning weddings. I feel more comfortable in dark colors and I think navy blue was invented for occasions where black is (or was) not acceptable.
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whiterose

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #51 on: October 18, 2019, 11:44:54 am »
Someone posted in the original Ehell forum back in Delphi that it was okay to wear black to an evening wedding in NYC, but not to a daytime wedding in Atlanta.

I know there are a lot of gray areas in between- those are the two extremes.

But I am very glad nobody wore black to my morning wedding in the South.

Why would it have made a difference?

I don't know when Whiterose married, but I do remember times when there were very specific "rule" on wearing black, not just in the south. I read an article in the NY Times a year ago that talked about the adoption of all black in the city in the late 70's early 80s and it was the avant-garde who really popularized it and at first some even in NYC were horrified by it. 

Adoption wasn't wide spread until probably the late 80's early 90's. I graduated college in the late 1980s and my first job was in Southern California. One of the first really nice outfits I bought was a black light weight knit pencil skirt with matching black top. The outfit looked great on but it took me forever to convince myself in the dressing room that even though I was only 21, I could pull off an all black work outfit without looking like I was going to a funeral. In S. Cal, I only ever got compliments. When I moved back to Texas a year later and would wear the outfit to work, I'd often get someone asking me if I was attending a funeral that day. My mom admitted the outfit looked good but really disliked seeing me since she still held to the idea that young 20 year olds did not dress in all black during the day, especially in the Spring. 

So yeah, can see where black at a morning wedding in the South would have been pretty out of place.

I got married in April of this year. It was a beautiful springtime morning.

An all-black outfit would have felt very out of place. One guest did wear a black skirt- with a beautiful turquoise blouse, so it fit in with the other light colored outfits the other women guests and wedding party members wore. It was not out of place. But given how others dressed, the dress code, and the season, time, weather and location- an all-black outfit would have been a dissonant note IMHO.

TootsNYC

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Re: Is it ever OK to wear black to a wedding?
« Reply #52 on: October 18, 2019, 01:13:46 pm »
Someone posted in the original Ehell forum back in Delphi that it was okay to wear black to an evening wedding in NYC, but not to a daytime wedding in Atlanta.

I know there are a lot of gray areas in between- those are the two extremes.

But I am very glad nobody wore black to my morning wedding in the South.

Why would it have made a difference?

Daytime black could look pretty funereal. Because funerals are in the daytime, so anything slightly dressy in black would be the thing you chose to wear to a funeral.


Eveningwear black would not look funeral--the fabric would be very different, as would the cut.

Time was that people always wore black to funerals. And they wore black for weeks or months if there was a death in the family. (also, black clothes weren't normally considered fancy, because it was hard to keep them a deep black, because the dye would fade; it's an extreme color, dye-listically speaking)

It's not quite as prevalent as it used to be; more people just wear nice clothes that aren't particularly bright. But it used to be a big deal.
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