Author Topic: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?  (Read 2448 times)

Twik

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Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« on: May 13, 2019, 03:13:55 pm »
interesting article today http://www.msn.com/en-ca/lifestyle/weddings/a-best-man-started-a-break-up-bet-at-his-best-friends-wedding-and-it-did-not-end-well/ar-AABithl?ocid=ientp about a best man who, during his speech, announced he was running a pool about when the happy couple would get divorced. He thinks he was being a great bro - if they stay together long enough, they get the money! What a cool prize!

Strangely, the non-bro members of the wedding are furious at him, and he's confused and perplexed as to why.

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Chez Miriam

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #1 on: May 13, 2019, 03:37:17 pm »
interesting article today http://www.msn.com/en-ca/lifestyle/weddings/a-best-man-started-a-break-up-bet-at-his-best-friends-wedding-and-it-did-not-end-well/ar-AABithl?ocid=ientp about a best man who, during his speech, announced he was running a pool about when the happy couple would get divorced. He thinks he was being a great bro - if they stay together long enough, they get the money! What a cool prize!

Strangely, the non-bro members of the wedding are furious at him, and he's confused and perplexed as to why.

All I can hope, is that this dope remains forever single. >:(
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich
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lakey

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #2 on: May 13, 2019, 04:43:55 pm »
Sometimes humor or "bro" humor is actually thinly veiled hostility. This is nasty, and he'd have to be a complete idiot to not see how nasty it is. I can't imagine how my relatives would have reacted if anyone had made a speech or toast like that at a wedding. Fortunately the bride, bride's family, and the groom didn't give him a pass on his idiot behavior.
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Thitpualso

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #3 on: May 14, 2019, 04:58:53 pm »
Humor in Wedding toasts has to be carefully thought out and it must be gentle.  When Nephew 2 married, nephew 1 (who was the best man) made a lovely speech.  He wished the HC everything you would expect a loving brother to say and added at the end, ‘Also, thanks for getting married first.  That’s taken a lot of pressure off me’. 

That went down well with the guests Even the parents of the two brothers laughed heartily.

The lottery described in the link was, in my mind, the exact opposite.  Did anyone who contributed to the pool stop to think about how the HC would feel about their marriage being treated like a basketball team in March Madness?  Did anyone really believe that the money would be carefully preserved for 20 years? 

I think not. 

It’s good that there was blow-back on this. The idiot Best Man deserved what he got.
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L

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #4 on: May 14, 2019, 08:23:23 pm »
Sometimes humor or "bro" humor is actually thinly veiled hostility. This is nasty, and he'd have to be a complete idiot to not see how nasty it is. I can't imagine how my relatives would have reacted if anyone had made a speech or toast like that at a wedding. Fortunately the bride, bride's family, and the groom didn't give him a pass on his idiot behavior.

I'd say rather not-at-all veiled hostility!  Was the best many angry that the bride 'stole' his buddy?
Mother, cat servant, frustrated gardener
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Hanna

Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #5 on: May 14, 2019, 09:58:22 pm »
So he’s planning on holding onto $3k for 22 years then giving it to them? Right.  (Anyone calculated the future value of that yet?)

Also, what kind of friends do these people have that so many people went along with this?! I’d venture to say any one of us here would have handed the guy’s head to him before he gave the speech if we’d been at that wedding and asked to bet.
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Chez Miriam

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #6 on: May 15, 2019, 03:47:02 am »
So he’s planning on holding onto $3k for 22 years then giving it to them? Right.  (Anyone calculated the future value of that yet?)

Also, what kind of friends do these people have that so many people went along with this?! I’d venture to say any one of us here would have handed the guy’s head to him before he gave the speech if we’d been at that wedding and asked to bet.

We've been to/been invited to a couple of weddings where we privately wondered how long the marriage would last, and we most definitely would have shut that down immediately.  What my husband and I discuss in the privacy of our own homes is not necessarily what we say in public.  In public, we would wish the happy couple all the very best and say nothing about predicted longevity of a marriage; it's absolutely none of our business!

I heard a best man speech where he told of the groom eating "pineapple chunks" when falling-down drunk.  I hadn't a clue what was funny about that, so had to ask my (then) boyfriend; turns out "pineapple chunks" was a slang term/euphemism for the freshener blocks that live in the bottom of urinals. :o :o :o

I thought that speech was in very bad taste!  I suspect I may have heckled the best man in the story.
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich
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TootsNYC

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #7 on: May 15, 2019, 09:36:07 pm »
I remember being really offended on the couple's behalf when the priest at their wedding made a joke about having to chase the groom to drag him back to the altar.

IN THE HOMILY.

It was just so rude.

(and inaccurate; the groom was incandescently enthusiastic)
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gellchom

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Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #8 on: May 16, 2019, 02:28:34 pm »
I remember being really offended on the couple's behalf when the priest at their wedding made a joke about having to chase the groom to drag him back to the altar.

IN THE HOMILY.

It was just so rude.

(and inaccurate; the groom was incandescently enthusiastic)

I don't know why people still think that this tired, sexist trope of men being roped into marriage is funny anyway, let alone in such a screamingly inappropriate context.  I remember on an old board someone saying that they loved to give a pair of running shoes as an engagement gift to grooms.  I cannot imagine any couple not finding that incredibly insulting.
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Hanna

Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #9 on: May 16, 2019, 04:39:01 pm »
I remember being really offended on the couple's behalf when the priest at their wedding made a joke about having to chase the groom to drag him back to the altar.

IN THE HOMILY.

It was just so rude.

(and inaccurate; the groom was incandescently enthusiastic)

I don't know why people still think that this tired, sexist trope of men being roped into marriage is funny anyway, let alone in such a screamingly inappropriate context.  I remember on an old board someone saying that they loved to give a pair of running shoes as an engagement gift to grooms.  I cannot imagine any couple not finding that incredibly insulting.
I was at a wedding where the same joke was made to the bride! It was honestly hysterical but we totally raised our own eyebrows and we’re pretty shocked. The groom seemed to get a kick out of it.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2019, 03:20:23 pm by Hanna »
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Aleko

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It's extraordinary what some people think is acceptable humour at weddings. I once read an article in which a professional wedding photographer shared some 'tips of the trade', including how, when you have to organise the wedding party into position for group shots, you have to jolly them along with humorous chat, such as "calling out to the bridegroom's mother to pull her tummy in a bit".  :o :o :o.

I'm amazed that man was still alive, let alone got recommended and hired.
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gramma dishes

It's extraordinary what some people think is acceptable humour at weddings. I once read an article in which a professional wedding photographer shared some 'tips of the trade', including how, when you have to organise the wedding party into position for group shots, you have to jolly them along with humorous chat, such as "calling out to the bridegroom's mother to pull her tummy in a bit".  :o :o :o.

I'm amazed that man was still alive, let alone got recommended and hired.

I cannot imagine this guy having done more than one wedding.  Wow!  ::)
« Last Edit: May 17, 2019, 08:34:04 am by gramma dishes »
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Twik

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It's extraordinary what some people think is acceptable humour at weddings. I once read an article in which a professional wedding photographer shared some 'tips of the trade', including how, when you have to organise the wedding party into position for group shots, you have to jolly them along with humorous chat, such as "calling out to the bridegroom's mother to pull her tummy in a bit".  :o :o :o.

I'm amazed that man was still alive, let alone got recommended and hired.

Possibly this is his way of keeping out competition.

BeagleMommy

Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #13 on: September 23, 2019, 11:39:04 am »
The fact that this guy doesn't think he was the jerk speaks volumes about him.
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Donna Gibbons

Re: Would this qualify as wedding guest Darwinism?
« Reply #14 on: September 23, 2019, 02:06:50 pm »
The best man at my wedding had the show play “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.” I’ve never forgotten it, been married 28 years...