Bad Manners and Brimstone

I already know I'm NOT going to say this, or anything, because I know it would not go over well coming from me.
But I'm curious, what would you do?

Here's the situation.

A good friend has a dog and three cats. Up till extremely recently, her house was fine. Clean, no smell issues.

However, about a week ago, I went over there for a short visit, and the smell of cat pee was overwhelming. What I mean is, it wasn't just a hint, or in a certain room. It was everywhere in the house, and it was strong. I smelled it the second I walked in the door.

She had mentioned to me previously that one of her cats was not using the litter box, and that she had set up a camera to see which one. She identified the guilty party, and is convinced that the cat in question has a UTI which explains its issue.

I honestly didn't think about it much one way or the other till I stepped into her house and smelled it.

I am not a pet person -- I don't have any and while I'm fine around animals, I don't go out of my way to interact with them, and honestly prefer not to have to engage.
That alone is a good enough reason for me not to say anything to her.

However, multiple people have been in her house over the last week, and there has been discussion among them, some including me, about the smell.
No one, to my knowledge, has said anything to her. It's a difficult subject to broach!

So I'm curious - would you say anything? And if so, what?

lowspark -- THANKS! Love the wording for the invite. Huge help!

I'm not a huge fan of games either, but DD#1 said "Balloons, a photo stage and LOTS of games!" was all she asked for. Not everybody needs to participate, and we'll try to make the games a side-show (sprinkled in here and there) if that makes sense.


Hmmm -- I'll bring up the time change to the committee . . . I like the logic behind it. Thanks!


Anybody have any thoughts on games? Please?

Also -- a new question -- there will be six (so far) children attending. Ages 3-8. I thought about having a kiddie area/table with coloring books and stuff to help keep them entertained. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated!

People who are chronically late are essentially saying that their time is worth more than anyone else's.
Additionally, those people inevitably CAN be on time when it really matters -- to them.

I agree with the above. 

Writing my response in present tense even though I realize this is all over and resolved, but it's just easier.


This is a tough one since it involves catching a flight.

Say you don't wait for her, what will you do once you arrive at the destination? Will you go on to the hotel? Will you go on to do the vacation activities, whether preplanned or just off the cuff?
What happens when she does arrive on a later flight -- is that later flight the same day? The next day?
She then has to arrange her own transportation to the hotel, and then depending on the time of her arrival, figure out how to meet up with you wherever you may be.

What if the ultimate destination is a cruise, or involves tickets to a particular attraction which cannot be obtained except in advance? Do you go on without her?

To clarify, I think you are 100% in the right no matter what you choose to do... but you still have to deal with any fallout.

People who are chronically late are essentially saying that their time is worth more than anyone else's.
Additionally, those people inevitably CAN be on time when it really matters -- to them.

So once your wife changed her ways for the international flight situation, she CLEARLY could change her behavior for ALL situation.
She chose not to.

I have known people like this. Fortunately, it was never a significant other.
It's really crummy behavior.

Boarding flights always involved hurrying across one of the largest airports in the U.S. due to my husbands sense of timing.  A few years ago we literally ran across two concourses to barely make our flight.  I read husband the riot act and when packing I always tell him I will NOT be running across the airport ever again.  And we manage to leave the house with time to stroll to the gate.